You know, I don't do things for the thanks, but I really feel like gratitude just isn't a habit that is taught anymore. I went and interpreted for a 10 year old deaf girl for three hours this morning, out in the sun. I had to drive 45 min each way to get there. Afterward, the Mom said "thanks for coming out and helping us", and she said it like I'd watched her bag for ten minutes.
On top of that, an old friend sent me baby pictures the other week, and I figured that he was just oblivious (as new parents can be) to the fact that it might have been nice to have known that they were pregnant *before* getting mass emailed the birth story, especially since they know how hard (and long) I've been trying to get pregnant. His only acknowledgement of my recent miscarriage was that my husband is obviously fertile! His kid is like 2 weeks old, and he's already all about work and fixing his deck. It just bugs me when folks don't realize how good they've got it, you know?
Meanwhile, I make a daily point of telling my husband how much I appreciate him. I look him in the eye and say thank you when he makes me a salad, or does a special load of laundry for my studio stuff. I have a great husband, and I make sure that he knows it! In fact, I heard a few folks bad mouthing 'men' the other month, and said that, actually, my husband does most of the cooking and grocery shopping, and all of the machine laundry. I do dishes and folding, since they are things that I can do a little bit at a time. He and I both wish that I could do more, but he still makes me feel that my efforts are appreciated too.
Anyone read 'Simple Abundance'? I do the gratitude thing. First on my list every day is my family and friends. Second is that I can walk today (if it is a day when I can't I am grateful that I could before, and will again!) So, today's 3-5 are:
*that I did something for someone else, and still feel good about it, even though I don't feel appreciated by the folks I did it for
*the gorgeous lilies that I saw today, just about ready to bloom
*the fact that the electric department takes checks by phone so that I didn't have to go out in the heat again today to pay my bill when I came home to having had my power turned off (oops! Guess I missed that one on bill day!)
Night all - I appreciate you!
I liked reading your gratitudes very much! I've got a fabbo partner too - and he also understands that there are days I can't manage to get out of bed and that's ok. And I DO tell him all the time how grateful I am for his cooking, cleaning, driving me places when my legs are too weak to drive... people give me funny looks, as though thanking your partner isn't necessary - huh?
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm grateful back atcha for continuing to blog!
Well, if most folks *don't* verbally thank their partners, they will be a very long line for the divorce court. No one likes being taken for granted!
ReplyDeleteOk, I feel much better now; I was openning up bills to pay (as per my agreement with myself) when I noticed a check I had written to the electric dept fall out of one - I had apparently forgotten to *sign it*!!!
ReplyDeleteSo, I wasn't careless and not paying a bill, I was scatty, and not signing the stupid thing.
It might not seem like a huge distinction, but it is to me! Phew!
I have read Simple Abundance as my grandmom gave it to me a few years ago to try to cheer me up. IT can be so hard sometimes--with everything that weighs on us--that we can overlook the little things that are meaningful.
ReplyDeleteYes. I hate the flippant baby things that people do/say/act too. It can be hurtful although unintentional.
I thank my husband a lot too. He's a good guy and does a lot for me and I do appreciate it.